Hello, Reader!
I’ll never forget the moment I looked my boss’ boss in the eye and said something I absolutely did not mean to say out loud.
Years ago, I was juggling a full-time job and leading a major career initiative on the side — because of course I was. Many of you know this rhythm intimately: someone hands you an institutional priority and you just… make it happen.
One day, I was in this dean’s office with my boss. The three of us were strategizing, ideas flying, pressure rising, and at some point my brain-to-mouth filter just… left the building.
“Well, this is my night job,” I blurted out.
Hand. Over. Mouth.
Instant mortification.
The dean froze mid-stride and stared at me like I had just announced I moonlighted as a backup dancer for Pitbull.
And for years afterward, I replayed that moment in my head like an embarrassing home movie.
The look.
The tone.
The apology.
The story I told myself about what he must have thought.
If you’ve ever looped a moment like this, welcome! You’re in excellent company.
Because when life on campus slows, our brains… do not.
Why the slowdown invites overthinking
November is the month when career services takes a breath, and your brain takes the wheel.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t exactly drive responsibly.
A few things happen:
- Rumination rushes into the space work used to fill.
Your calendar gets lighter. Your brain says, “Great, finally time to replay everything you’ve ever said!”
- Planning gets tangled with perfectionism.
You want to dive into planning for next semester.
Your brain wants to run a full forensic analysis of this term first.
- Burnout masquerades as "just thinking."
Mental fatigue doesn’t show up as exhaustion, it shows up as overthinking. None of this means you’re broken.
It means your mind is trying (a little too hard) to protect you.
What overthinking is really doing
Psychologists tell us overthinking is your brain’s survival algorithm doing its best impression of a hyper-vigilant mall cop:
- Fixers replay conversations to avoid future mistakes.
- Worriers rehearse disasters that will never happen.
- Over-analyzers investigate every possible angle, even the imaginary ones.
These patterns are strengths, just dialed up one notch past usefulness.
And sometimes they show up in wild ways.
I occasionally get a flash image, while driving, of a car crashing into mine. It’s jarring and irrational, but it makes sense: my brain is simply yelling, “Be careful!”
Our minds believe fear = preparation.
They’re not wrong on instinct; just wrong on dosage.
The good news, Reader: You can retrain them.
A gentler practice: how to interrupt the loop
Here’s the simple exercise that works for me and for my clients:
Step 1: Notice the loop
“Ah. My brain has begun tonight’s double feature.”
Step 2: Take a few deep breaths, then ask:
“Brain, what are you trying to tell me?” Listen for one word or even a phrase: fear, uncertainty, frustration, anger, embarrassment, exhaustion. If you don’t get anything, that’s ok.
Step 3: Then, go deeper:
“Thank you for sharing. Now, what are you trying to protect me from?” That’s where the insight usually lives.
Step 4: Thank yourself
Your brain softens when it feels appreciated. “Thank you, brain. Thank you for trying to take care of me. I’ve got it from here.”
Step 5: Shift from spiraling to solving
Ask yourself: “What’s one useful next step?” Not 20 steps. Just one.
Examples to make this real
These tiny pivots turn over-activity into clarity.
- If you’re beating yourself up for blurting out “Well… this is basically my night job,” your brain is saying, “You’re over capacity and need to communicate earlier and clearer.”
One useful next step: jot down the key points you want leadership to understand about your workload and priorities, so you’re ready the next time the topic comes up.
- If you’re spiraling because employer engagement is dropping and you’ve decided it must be your fault, your brain likely is trying to avoid being blindsided next semester.
One useful next step: reconnect with one employer this week. One email restores forward motion and calm.
- If you got overly defensive in a team meeting about spring programming, your brain was trying to protect the part of you that worked hard.
One useful next step: write down the one piece of feedback that was genuinely helpful. Leave the rest for later.
🎯 This activity is a practice. It may not work the first (or even second) time you try it. Pay attention anyway, because I bet you’ll find by even asking yourself these questions, the rumination stops.
Continuing this exercise creates safety—the kind your mind needs to soften, share, and release what it’s held tightly for too long.
Final thought
You have carried a lot on your shoulders these past months — the events, the advising, the student stress, the employer expectations, the institutional pressure, the thousand micro-decisions no one ever sees.
And we don’t talk enough about the emotional labor of career services.
The holding.
The guiding.
The planning.
The navigating.
The perpetual case-making.
The constant push to be strategic, supportive, steady, and sharp.
Thanksgiving season gives us a small window to soften into our own humanity.
To breathe more deeply, unclench your shoulders, let your mind rest from its over-vigilance.
And to remember that you’re a person before you’re a planner.
This is the moment to shift into gratitude:
- for the team that carried the weight with you
- for the colleagues who challenge and champion you
- for the leaders who open doors
- for the students whose futures you shape and
- importantly, for yourself, for every ounce of heart and strategy you brought to this fall.
Remember: overthinking isn’t evidence that something’s wrong. It’s evidence that you’ve been working incredibly hard mentally, emotionally, strategically.
Let these next two weeks be the time you give your mind more kindness, your body more rest, and your spirit more room to reset.
I’m cheering for you.
And I’m grateful for the work you do every day, often behind the scenes, shaping futures and changing lives in ways most people will never fully see.
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Thanks for reading!
P.P.S. We’re building a community of leaders shaping the future of career services. Know someone who should be part of it? Invite them here.
